When it comes to the idea of a supreme being I am an apathetic agnostic. Our motto of “We don’t know and we don’t care” seems to sum up exactly how I feel about gods, religions, and all that other stuff. I don’t hate those things, but I don’t care for them either. That was not always the case though. I used to be religious.
It was a long time ago but I still think about it to this day because I feel it’s important to understand how experiences completely shape who we are. My experiences were mainly shaped by the very conservative and religious mid-Michigan town I grew up in. Luckily, I was born to a family that had a religious past, but wasn’t overly religious in its own right making my upbringing atypical among my peers. The pressure to conform was too great however, and by my middle school years I found what I thought was god. Time has since shown me that was not god, but was instead my own inner dialogue but with an artificial authority. By the time I was a sophomore in high school I was thoroughly convinced that my concept of god was critically flawed and began looking for more answers. They did not come and considering the fact that a good 90% of my friends were overtly religious and the other 10% seemed to be religious to a lesser degree it was no wonder I felt out of place and simply chose to live a lie to make my life easier until another opportunity presented itself.
College was that opportunity and I flourished in the environment it provided. There were a token few who were religious, but for the most part it didn’t seem to play a huge role in the lives of my new friends and was a complete 180 from what I knew in my hometown. By this point in my life I knew for a fact that religion wasn’t for me, but I was still unsure about the question of a god’s existence. In fact, I’m still unsure, hence my agnosticism. In practice I live my life as an atheist but hold out on the explicit denial of an atheist or antitheist and I’m happy with my position because it meshes with the rest of my worldview based on naturalistic materialism (the pretentious way of saying science).
So now I’m happy with my lack of a belief system based on a non-natualistic philosophy. I don’t know if there is a god(s) and based on what people have told me of their various gods I don’t care to know or worship any of them.